Thanks to everyone who chimed in with additional Preschooler Soccer Tales of Woe. My sister-in-law commented that Ellie might just be an introvert and if that was the case she certainly comes by it honestly, and that made me realize there is a very long list of things I would rather do than play on a soccer team, including: watching a slideshow of a Google image search for the term “dock spider” while seated between someone eating something really crunchy and a Men’s Rights Activist. We missed last week’s game due to being away at the cottage, but we will try again this week with greatly lowered expectations.
Dock spiders truly are an abomination unto the Lord. I’m going to repeat the same warning I gave when I blogged about the cottage last year: whatever you do, do NOT google dock spider. (Or do, whatever. I’m not your mom.) The first morning at the cottage Mike took the kids to visit a friend of his from work who has a cottage at a neighbouring resort community, and I sat out on the dock with my book and my coffee and read and relaxed and listened to the peaceful sound of the water lapping against the dock. I think my brain, in some sort of self-preservation mode, must have blocked out the very existence of the dock spider, because when one appeared I was freshly filled with horror that such a thing lives and thrives in Ontario. This is Canada! We’re not Australia! We don’t have giant spiders! BUT WE DO.
Other than that, the week was truly lovely. We swam and relaxed and ate ice cream and Mike took Ellie canoeing for the first time, which she loved and called “going laking” and was very pleased to do in the evenings after Zach was in bed. I read a bunch of books (Where’d You Go, Bernadette? by Maria Semple, Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri, One Good Turn: A Jolly Murder Mystery by Kate Atkinson, and part of All The Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr, which is this month’s book club book and is very good but for some reason I’m having trouble getting into it) and slept in a lot, thanks to the wonderfulness of Mike, who had become the preferred parent by virtue of the novelty of him being around every day.
At some point I ended up in the Fatty Arbuckle entry in Wikipedia (I have no idea how, such is the way of Wikipedia) and there was a quote that gave me such an enjoyable chuckle I thought you might enjoy it as well. Louise Brooks, an actress he worked with, described how graceful and agile he was in spite of his rotundity, saying, “Oh, I thought he was magnificent in films. He was a wonderful dancer—a wonderful ballroom dancer, in his heyday. It was like floating in the arms of a huge doughnut—really delightful.” Floating in the arms of a doughnut! That WOULD be really delightful.