Fig. 1.1, baby with fabulous bedhead

At Zach’s 12-month appointment last week, the med student who was measuring his head paused and said in an awed tone of voice, “Wow! He has a really great head of hair.” Forget all the other milestones, this baby has medically-recognized fantastic hair! (DIAGNOSIS: FABULOUS.) The other good head-related news from the appointment was that his enormous noggin is back on the growth charts, which I suppose means it won’t continue to grow disproportionately to the rest of his body until he is a 15-year-old real-life Humpty Dumpty, teased by other kids but recruited by top-tier universities to play as an offensive lineman on a football team while majoring in some sort of social science that won’t really help him get a job later on. The Boy With the Golden Head, the sports magazines will call him, referring to both his battering-ram skull and his flowy, shampoo-commercial hair.  (The bad news from the appointment — bad for measles and for his wee chubby limbs — was that he received four shots, each of which he was very! unhappy! about. He will thank me for it later.)

We are having our living room painted in November. We had to hire a professional painter for this, because our living room has very high ceilings, but this has some additional benefits, namely that she can use her scaffolding to change the burned-out lightbulb in the ceiling fan that otherwise would likely be burned out forever, because … what exactly are we supposed to do about it? How did the house designer see this playing out? The ceiling is far higher than our tallest step ladder and the fan is right in the middle of the room, making it inaccessible with an extension ladder. Anyway, we also get a free consultation with a colour consultant, which will hopefully prevent some of my usual Endless Paint Colour Dithering, wherein I continue to second-guess our choice up to and including the time when the person at Home Depot is actually mixing our paint. It won’t eliminate it entirely, however, because it is currently painted a) easily-marked-up-and-always-dirty-looking-as-a-result builder-grade white paint, and b) dark chocolate brown, which is a colour I very much like in chocolate but don’t much care for on the wall, so at this point we don’t have any ideas, other than “not terrible white paint” and “not chocolate brown”. Most of the accessories in that room are green, red, and brown, but other than the brown furniture, we’re not married to any of it, and even the brown furniture could be replaced, because it is old and stained due to kids and pets and the fact that I myself am a notorious spiller. Internet, I turn to you for your advice: if you didn’t have to deal with a) the cost, b) my indecisiveness, and c) potential post-painting regret, what colour would you paint our living room?