I was visiting the actual homepage for my blog the other day for some reason instead of the back end through which I do the writing, and I noticed that the vast majority of my posts seem to consist of two very long paragraphs filled with parenthetical remarks. Seriously, have a look. The uniformity of the posts is almost embarassing. Apparently that’s a thing I do? But I am nothing if not excited by an opportunity for personal growth, so we’re going to try a little something different today: I’m going to toss a few bullet points up on the screen, try not to edit them too heavily, and then hit the Publish button.

1) So that one eyetooth from the other day? Was actually THREE eyeteeth. She was miserable because she was … well, miserable. Parenting fail! I told Mike on Wednesday that I had kind of phoned it in, parenting-wise, to make up for the day before, but then later when I showed him Ellie’s new Kermit the Frog impression (arms flailing above her head, yelling “Yaaaayyyyy!”) he said clearly I had NOT phoned it in. It’s nice to be on the same page with the other parent in terms of what our expectations are.

2) I’m not much for economics (I had to take an economics class in university, and I got a C, of which I was more proud than any A I had ever earned, because that stuff is complicated) but my interest was piqued the other day by a segment on The Daily Show about the new 1-trillion dollar coin they’re thinking of minting in the United States to somehow to solve the fiscal cliff issue they’re facing. On the one hand, I don’t understand how that makes any sense (you can just … make more money? isn’t that what causes inflation? they did not cover this scenario in my class, and any time I ask Mike to explain something like this he always says, “Do you REALLY want to know?” and I always decide I do not) but on the other hand, wouldn’t that make for a really tremendous heist movie? I laid awake far too long the other night, forcing Mike to listen to me as I casted the movie. He — for reasons that are unclear to me — strenuously objected to my insistence that Nicolas Cage play the lead. We eventually settled on Jennifer Garner (CIA agent who turns out to be a mole) and Kiefer Sutherland (decorated military general, coming out of retirement for one last job) as well as possibly Samuel L. Jackson (head of the ragtag band of heisters). Also James Morrison as the corrupt head of the Federal Reserve. If there are any movie producers reading this, call me! I have many more ideas like the above.

3) Ellie is napping, and it is so, so gloomy outside that I decided naptime would be best spent under a fuzzy blanket with my copy of The Fault in Our Stars, which my sister-in-law got me for Christmas. Now, I knew this was a sad book. What I did NOT know was that long before I’m even halfway into through, I need someone to come over and pet my hair and make me tea and murmur comforting things to me.