Two things have happened in the last 24 hours that have convinced me that the world has collectively lost its ability to distinguish between red and yellow. I am currently about 100 pages from the end of the last book in a series that should probably remain nameless (*cough* Twilight *cough*) except for the fact that I can’t stop talking about how badly these books are written. At one point in the chapter I was reading last night, the narrator introduces two new characters – vampires that have blonde hair. A few pages later, she refers to the “strawberry” hair of one of the aforementioned blonde vampires. Now, I know there is such a thing as strawberry blonde hair (Nancy Drew had it, although they frequently referred to it as “titian” hair) but there is a very distinct difference between strawberry blonde (i.e. blonde hair with a slight hint of red) and strawberry (i.e. the bright red fruit we make jam out of during the two weeks in June in which they are they are in season in our poor sad frozen country).
And then, when I was in the car this afternoon with the radio tuned to the local Christian station (I generally like the music but the DJs are second rate at best) I had to suffer through three minutes of inane prattle between the DJ and his sidekick on how the sidekick likes weather that’s cool (but not too cold) or warm (but not too hot). She opined that as far as the weather is concerned, she had might as well be Goldilocks. The DJ interjected that she just needed some red hair and she’d be all set. Again – and you can correct me if I’m wrong here – I believe there is a difference between red (the colour of firetrucks, cherries, and the scarlet letter) and yellow (the colour of lemons, rubber duckies, and, I don’t know, the GOLDEN LOCKS of the beloved heroine of a widely known fairy tale involving bears and the varying temperature of their breakfast cereal).
If I worked for the media, I would blame this phenomenon on these times of economic uncertainty, but since I’m not, I am just going to say I think everyone’s gone insane.